The blog home of erotic fiction author, Jacqueline Applebee. Black sexuality, smutty snippets and more. Contains adult concepts. For Over 18's only. My main writing website is at Writing in Shadows. *
Poem: Personal Ad Hell
No butches,
No bis,
No blacks.
No fat chicks,
No trannies,
No chaps.
Must be athletic;
a real girl, no prosthetics.
Long hair,
Very queer,
Good in the sack.
But I’m easy going,
If you’re young, hot and boring.
Why not give me a tinkle?
Cos for some reason I’m still single.
London preferred;
Brighton inferred.
Must drive,
Must drink,
Must not support Spurs!
Must own at least two cats.
Must put up with all my crap.
Must be delightfully ironic.
Must not be an alcoholic.
Must be seriously in love with the Stereophonics!
No kinky girls need apply.
No girls who wanna bit on the side.
No Asians, no straights,
No girls full of hate.
No one on the planning committee of London Pride.
I’m not into drama,
But I love Lady Gaga.
If you look like her, you’re in
(As long as you don’t wear that meat-dress thing)
You see, I think we’d make a good fit,
If you’re young, hot and rich,
So why not give me a tinkle?
Cos for some reason I’m still single.
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Back when I was a closeted bisexual, I’d secretly look at newspapers and magazines like Loot, Pink Paper and Time Out. Most of these publications had lots of Personals in their classified section. I found it all quite disheartening to read row upon row of text, where each one would say, “No bisexuals” or “No butches.” It was rare to see, “No blacks” but the wording of most ads spelled it out in other ways. I think the butch excluding confused me the most, but hey, femmes can be bigots too, I guess. Now that things have moved online for the most part, I still see wording like this. The only exception to this situation is on OK Cupid, where if you put that you’re a bisexual woman on your profile, zillions of men will flood your mailbox (with what, I don’t even want to know…)
Photo: J. Applebee, The Bisexual Stall at London Pride 2010
A Poem: I Can’t Be Bi. I’m a Man.
I was saddened by the biphobia that’s on twitter. The sexist assumptions, the implied violence, and the awful spelling are just staggering. This is one of my ways of coping with it all.
All bi’s are girls.
All bi’s are ho’s.
They may look well fit
but my dick ain’t touching one of those.
No men are ever bi.
No blacks are ever queer.
Say different & you’re a liar;
nuthin I wanna hear.
Ain’t insulting at all,
to call something rubbish, “gay.”
I know plenty of battymen. They don’t mind.
But I ain’t one. No Way!
Bi’s are just looking for attention.
Bi’s think they’re smokin’ hot.
Buy a clue, greedy bitches;
everyone else knows when to stop.
I ain’t never looked at another man.
Don’t you know, I’m dead straight?
I like beating queers up.
Put ‘em in their bloody place.
Messing about that one time don’t count.
I’m not queer, no way!
He was drunk. I was horny,
but that don’t make me gay.
Don’t you call me a bi boy.
I’m with the studs, not the ho’s.
Cos everyone knows all bi’s are girls
and I ain’t one of those.
Inspired by some very nasty comments on twitter re-posted by @biphobic_bigots,
@biphobic_bigots: “Collecting hate speech and outing biphobes and bigots on Twitter. Don’t troll the bigots. Just because they’re idiots, doesn’t mean you have to be.”
Since the publication of groundbreaking study that bisexual men do in fact exist, I thought it would be a good time to post something from my upcoming book. Below is the introduction to Bisexual Men, which will be released on 23rd September (International Celebrate Bisexuality day). Bisexual Men will be available in print and as an e-book on eXcessica, Amazon.com and Amazon.co.uk
Introduction
In search of the Invisible Man
Where are all the bisexual men? Where are the male role models, making it easier for others to accept who they are? Where are the male celebrities stealing kisses at award ceremonies? Male-identified bisexuals don’t only exist in the media, they live next door, stand next to me at the bus stop. Bi men are friends and colleagues. But when I started thinking about bisexual men, I could only find a handful; a famous wrestler, a couple of rock stars, and various men in the European bisexual communities whom I’d see at BiCon (Convention of Bisexuality) every year. As much as I admired these guys, I knew I wanted more. But then maybe they were keeping quiet because bisexual men tend to get a raw deal in the grand scheme of things? Bi men bring queerness a little too close to home for the liking of some who find it easier to dismiss them as either curious or experimenting; never settling, but always a pretender to the throne.
Bisexuality has often been marginalised by both straight and gay/lesbian communities. It seems that every year a study is published to state that there is no such thing as bisexuality for men, as if sexual orientation can be boxed up and disposed of as simply as that. An attraction to more than one gender is not something just for women. Not all bisexual men live in secret (or on the Down-Low if you’re in the U.S). Some men are proud of their orientation, some are less so. Regardless of their visibility, I wanted to write something in celebration of these fierce souls who have open arms and hearts too. In doing so, I’ve learnt that these once-invisible men truly are everywhere.
Fuck ‘em all is a story about a man who completely accepts himself, including his sexuality. He only gets angry at people who don’t do the same. Homeless tells of a man who buys sex from men, with the full knowledge of his angelic wife. What’s in a Name? shows how a faux pas in bed (calling out the wrong lover’s name) can lead to self-discovery for all involved. Not with a bang, but a whimper sees a sexual surrogate observe her changing relationship with two men—one a lover and one a friend.
Some of the characters have to reach rock bottom before they start living the life they truly want. In How Special is Special? A man faces a terrible dilemma on his wedding day; choose the bride or the best man. My Generation is all about a man who finds himself taking a bit too much interest in the boy bands his daughter loves. He doesn’t want to call himself bisexual in case the name sticks, but he learns to embrace his changing desires with time.
Bisexual men come from all backgrounds: in David does BiCon, the central character falls for a man with ‘skin the colour of soot.’ I’ve found my man takes place during the Notting Hill Carnival, which is the largest multicultural event in Europe. The players quickly change their views as to what types of people are bisexual during a sexy evening of fun.
Bisexual men exist, period. If you still think they’re invisible, then maybe you’re looking in the wrong place. I love bisexual men, every single chance I get. Please enjoy these stories and see why that’s the case.
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Bisexual Men will be available in print and as an e-book on eXcessica, Amazon.com and Amazon.co.uk
Response to letter to JMS Books
Unfortunately, we don’t have any editorial staff able to address stories that contain sex between genders. Also, my own marketing expertise lies in gay or lesbian promo, and I don’t think I could adequately promote a book whose sexual content is between a man and a woman. Other presses can handle that better than us at this point in time. I’m sorry.
JM Snyder
JMS Books LLC
http://jms-books.com
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That’s the response I received. My question still stands: Why not call it GLT if that’s what it is?
To JMS books, a GLBT press
I am all kinds of disappointed with this. It’s like Stonewall have branched out into publishing…
From the Submissions page: “JMS Books LLC is a small press specializing in gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender fiction”
And further down the page: (my bolding)
“What we don’t accept:
We publish what we like to read. At this point in time, we are not accepting submissions from new authors in the genres of extreme BDSM or heterosexual, bisexual, or menage erotica.”
My email:
Dear J.M. Snyder,
I’ve just had a look at your submission page. Why would a GLBT press not want bisexual stories? Why not just say you are a GLT press and be done with it? It feels insulting to me, a bisexual writer who writes all sexual orientations. Biphobia includes erasing the existence of bisexuals in fact and fiction. Please consider the hurt this causes to people who face this kind of discrimination on a daily basis. I will never be gay enough for some folks, and I will never be straight enough either.
Please be better than this.
Regards
J. Applebee
Hurt
If half of me gets stabbed, all of me feels the pain.
I don’t often read the papers, because I end up getting very depressed, very quickly. However I did hear about the Ugandan queer rights activist found dead on 27th January 2011, and also about a lesbian threatened with deportation from the U.K to Uganda. When I opened the Guardian newspaper, I was shocked to see the photo above. I’ve heard plenty of people, both gay and straight talk about how bisexuals are sick, sad and evil, but it’s not often I’ll see the words in print. With such a powerful and unpleasant photo I was struck at how many myths were being enforced. Plus the woman above really hates bis. I mean she’s even hyphenated and shortened it just to be extra spiteful!
There are strong myth of all black people hating queers, and if, god forbid, we are actually queer ourselves, then we must be copying white folks. There are other stereotypes and lies: bisexual people don’t face the same stigma as gays and lesbians, which would be laughable if not for the little voice in my head that says, ‘if something bad happens because of my sexuality, just say homophobic, not biphobic, because no one will understand you.’ And then there’s the myth that says, If I act straight then nothing will happen. Well, could I look away if someone else were being hurt or threatened because of their sexuality? No, I could not. And in Uganda straight people don’t escape either, as failure to report a known queer person to the authorities can bring you the same grief as what will happen to them.
Things like this doesn’t just happen in Uganda. Black LGBT people are both highly visible (to bigoted straights) and invisible (to bigoted queers). I cannot and do not want to hide or look the other way. Even if I feel hurt so much of the time.
